There’s a little secret I wanted to share with you today.
As simple as it sounds the secret is the art of listening.
A lot of things in life can depend on whether you are good at listening.
Listening is a virtue that is so rare that you immediately stand out from the crowd.
People yearn for your company when you listen to them without interrupting.
If you can develop this trait of talking less and listening more, you will soon find that people want to be around you.
In fact, in all facets of life, it can benefit you immensely if you follow this little secret:
Talk less. Listen more!
Your friends and family will love you more because they find it easy to talk to you.
In an intimate relationship or any relationship, being the listening partner conveys the message that you care for them.
Listening without interruption helps others to express their views, their issues completely.
More often than not, the lack of communication and misunderstandings are the primary reasons for people to start drifting apart.
So what’s the secret to becoming a good listener?
1. Catch yourself in the act:
Listen to yourself!
Are you talking without ever giving a break or letting the other person express their views?
Stop there. Let the other person talk now. Ask questions that lead them to talk and contribute their part to the conversation.
2. Give attention:
When was the last time you listened to what the other person was saying?
I mean really listened?
Too often while listening to what someone is saying we start thinking about our next line while the other person is talking. Or we start analysing the other person’s words and start preparing a reply.
Nothing can be more frustrating than talking and not being listened to. It just unsettles the person that is speaking. So give all your attention to the speaker as they talk to you. Hear them out, without analysing.
Take in the information. You can analyse after the sentence is over or when they take a break. Even if they don’t, you can take time before giving your reply. This way, your replies will be better and a whole lot more effective.
3. Listen with your eyes:
Did you know that you listen with your eyes too?
Active listening is not just a job done with your ears. When you are talking to someone, maintain eye contact. Nothing is more encouraging when someone is speaking than talking to a wide-eyed listener. That shows that they have your full attention and it’s so beautiful when someone gives you their full attention.
This can not only help you in becoming a good listener but will also reveal a lot of things about the person you are talking to. The other person’s state of mind reveals itself to you through their eyes. Also, lies and half-truths can easily be noticed.
4. Lead with questions:
The best way to talk less and listen more is to ask questions during your part of the conversation. Answers almost always are longer than questions.
Asking leading questions gives you the opportunity to really get to know the person. Ask questions about things they just told you. This shows that you were really listening and gives them more confidence to speak and also raises their appreciation of you.
5. Let them finish:
How many times has someone concluded the message you are conveying before you have even finished speaking?
One very common mistake most of us make in our conversations is to jump ahead of the pace of the conversation and interrupt the person that is speaking.
Listen! Let the person that is speaking completely what they are telling you. If you don’t understand something clearly, ask them to tell you a little more about it or to explain it clearly. And then once they have completed their explanation, and only then give your reply.
Listening is a skill that needs to be cultivated regardless of who you are. It earns you a whole lot of points in personal and business relationships.
So go ahead, tell me what you think about talking less and listening more.
There are so many event's and networking coming up leading to the end of 2018 and the start of 2019. Try this out and let me know how you get on.
Would you like to master the art of creating a connection? Then join me on 21st December 2018.
I am going to be sharing some golden nuggets that you can apply not only in your career but finding love too.